hey.
Not feeling so great. Gonna give this another try.
Lately I feel less like a human and more like a burden, or a tumor, waiting to be discarded or extracted. I don't believe in myself, I don't believe that anyone believes in me, or trusts me, or, outside of family, thinks of me as more than an expendable distraction.
My life is boring and I'm content and I've given up. I fucked up my one shot at living, and it's too late to take it back. So now what?
Football is what. Football and loud fucking music and fifths of bourbon whiskey and trying to forget how much I can't fucking stand myself. Or at least distract myself with other things so I don't have to think about it too much.
so yeah i'm blogging again. got a new job. it's okay.
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why cant you stand yourself? Hey do you skype ever? Id like to chat sometime if you have time. im planetx_123 on there. i usually just leave it on away but half the times im actcually there.
ReplyDeleteSteve
There's not much to like. 8-5, M-F job, mortgage, bills, no excitement, no real connection to other people, no real connection to anything, really.
ReplyDeleteI never was one to want these things. I just... Gave up. Copped out. Took the easy road, and now I'm everyone else.
Oh. Also I do have skype but I'm kind of reserved to give it out. my username would reveal my real name, and all.
ReplyDeleteah i see. well i dont really care if you know who i am. im a boring 28 yo software developer. my a-side blog is http://manycupsofcoffee.blogspot.com/ and real name, etc.
ReplyDeleteso if its an issue of shared risk, then ...thats who i am. if you dont wanna chat then thats fine too. no worries.
steve
I've met and know both of you gentlemen, and can vouch each of you. ;-)
ReplyDeleteorly you know mr elterago. oh i didnt know that. how mysterious.
ReplyDelete